I just realised something after months of running, I keep finding excuses to run just because of emotions ever since I had been sitting on the fence over the upcoming runs in September till December.
The feeling of running over emotions versus the feeling of wanting to achieve a certain goal is definitely different and the risks involved are different too. (ok, this is just what I feel, different individuals varies)
True, running does make me feel better and like I am in my little world, but I realised something, just like in reality, running away from your emotions and problems does not give you the solution to end it and neither does it gives you the right mood to run either since your mind is occupied with something else. (and it's dangerous in safety aspects too!)
Maybe I am slow in this aspect, now after a break of running long distances, I came to realise something: "Hey, Yumi, you idiot! Do you know why can't you clear your target mileage all these while?! Quit running away! Face it! Clear your clutters, bring out the spirit that you have! Life is short, stop wasting time on things that you had already decided on! Move on! Keep running to your goals, don't stop hesitating over the past!"
It's exactly what I told my friends and boyfriend too! And why aren't I doing the same? Tsk tsk! Quit acting strong, face your weaknesses and conquer them to become your strength!
I got to carry on and move on to be a better person and a better runner. I will and I must work harder to reach my target mileage by end of this year. Not because I want to impress others, it's because that is me, the one who challenges herself for the sake of herself, not because of others like what I did when I was younger.
This is how running shapes up my personality, this is how running makes me both physically and mentally stronger. This what defines me; the challenger.
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